Parking the Helicopter

There’s probably no need to discuss the concept of “helicopter parenting” with camp families. Odds are good they already know how some parents can be “overprotective” or have an “excessive interest” in what their children are doing. Like a helicopter constantly hovering above, parenting can become excessive if children aren’t allowed to branch out on their own to try things without mom or dad always quick to swoop in to the rescue. It can be difficult for parents to “let go” like this. Camp parents, though, are presumably different. After all, they are choosing to “let go,” to send their children away into an environment where they will make many decisions for themselves, confront regular challenges on their own, probably struggle, and perhaps even fail at times. The independence gained, along with the feelings of confidence on competence that come with it, are valuable assets as a child grows up. I’d recommend reading How to Raise an Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims to better understand this modern phenomenon.  I can also recommend her 14-minute TED talk if you are really interested.

climbing girl dressed in blue

This is not to say camp parents are completely immune to helicoptering influences. We can’t really help but wonder how our girls are doing when they’re away at camp. Are they eating right? Are they remembering to take a shower? Brush their hair? Wear a clean shirt everyday? Are they having a good time? That’s the big one, right? Camps like Rockbrook understand this impulse and realize that all parents, to one degree or another, need some kind of reassurance that their kids are OK when they are away. That’s why, for example, we have our cabin counselors write letters to parents updating them.  It’s also why we maintain a daily photo gallery, and post the occasional videos during each camp session.

At the same time, checking the photo gallery can become an obsession for some parents, multiple times a day, combing through every photo for even a glimpse of their child. From afar, this form of helicoptering interest seems harmless enough as long as the child at camp is unaware of it, and the parent can resist the instinct to reach out and help in some way. We don’t want the photo gallery to energize the parental snowplow, so to speak.

One form of this helicoptering goes too far, however, and when parents fall into this trap, their child’s experience at camp often suffers. So let me warn you so you can, I hope, resist the urge to over-parent your child’s camp experience like this. The trap is to establish some hand gesture, like a “thumbs up,” that you tell your child to flash when their photo is being taken as a coded signal home about how camp is going. Akin to a “pick up deal” where a parent promises to “come get you if you’re homesick,” this kind of messaging might seem innocuous, but can be a real burden for the camper. It effectively is removing her from the moment, distracting her from the people and activity around her with thoughts of evaluation rather than true participation. When sending your daughter to camp, it’s simply best not to tether her to home in this way, and instead to send her off by reassuring her that you are confident in her ability to handle life at camp independently.

I’m sure you know that camp is the ideal place to practice this independent self-efficacy, and this is one of its main benefits. Oddly if we’re not careful, our parental instincts can undermine the opportunity for our girls to grow while away at camp. Some camps are so concerned by this signal phenomenon, they have banned campers from making signalling gestures and instructed their photographers to delete photos that appear to have them. My hope is that Rockbrook parents will see the problems associated with all of this, park their helicopter for a few weeks, and trust that their children and our staff at camp can work through any problems that may arise, and together ultimately create a rich, rewarding, and enjoyable camp experience.

girl camp friends

Meanwhile, we’ll continue to enjoy camp!  Your girls and their friends will splash and scream with delight rafting the Nantahala River.  They’ll climb the Alpine Tower and Castle Rock.  They’ll swim and float in the Rockbrook lake, tie increasingly elaborate friendship bracelets, shoot more arrows, and sing even louder songs. They’ll be surprised by hidden talents and creativity. They’ll find kindness and caring permeating their days, a refreshing tech-free, authenticity to what they’re doing and with whom they’re doing it. Surrounded by the beauty of these wooded mountains, they’ll explore and be amazed by what they find in the natural world. They’ll laugh harder than they have ever laughed before. They’ll learn a lot about themselves, and be proud of who they are and what they can do. They’ll make more fond memories and best friends than you can count. They’ll be at camp.

CA Campers Write

Girl's Tie Dye Pride

It occurred to me recently while scrolling through the online photo gallery that despite our two photographers taking hundreds of photos each day (one day this week, we posted more than 1800!), it’s pretty common for us to miss a lot of the action going on at camp. Partly that’s because everything is going on simultaneously and the photographers can’t be everywhere at once. While some girls are aiming rifles at paper targets, others are aiming basketballs at hoops. Some are riding horses, while others are painting and drawing. There’s weaving in Curosty, and ziplining in the woods above the office. Taking great photographs of girls making tie dyes, for example, means we’re missing others doing yoga or climbing Castle Rock. This also explains why you might go several days not seeing a photo of your daughter; the photographers simply missed her during the activity periods, and during her free time (just before lunch and dinner, and during “Twilight” right after dinner), when she may have spent time laying low, they were elsewhere. I know that can be frustrating, so feel free to give us a call if you want the photographers to make an extra effort to find your girl!

Small Girl Kayaking
Small Girl Zip Lining

Another limitation of our photo gallery is that it never does justice to the adventure trips that go out every day. Our photographers mostly stay in camp, so we rely on the trip leaders to snap a few photos of the girls as they are kayaking, rock climbing, whitewater rafting, backpacking and canoeing. As you can imagine, it can be tough to guide an adventure activity while also taking pictures of it. The photo gallery shows that different outdoor instructors are inconsistent with that, since this week alone we’ve had all of these trips and more offered to the girls. Day hikes, rafting, canoeing, kayaking, rock climbing, even a waterfall scramble for the older campers— there have been some amazing outdoor adventure options available. The online photo gallery, while providing an fun peek into our daily life at camp, is simply not complete. It comes close at times, but we’re always up to more than you see there.

The other day, several of our CA campers, who are girls who have finished the ninth grade, took some time to write down how they are feeling about camp. I thought it would be interesting to hear a camper’s point of view, so I asked them, “What do you want people to know about your experience at Rockbrook?” Here are a few of the responses.

Hiking Waterfall Rock

“CA year at Rockbrook is one of the most highly anticipated. I decided to go for a full session this summer so that I could get the whole camp experience. The past few weeks have gone by in a blur of paint, glitter, adventure, joy and excitement. I have been able to bond with all of my cabin mates and create new memories that I will remember forever. These girls have seen me in my most natural state, and I think there is extreme comfort in the fact that there are people here that don’t expect you to be anything other than that. Being older, I also find that talking to counselors is much easier. They have become my friends (as well as family). I do miss home a lot, but the people at Rockbrook keep me from being sad about it. Rather than feeling upset and homesick, I’m simply excited to share my experiences and adventures.” —Kendall

Rafting Girls Camp

“Anxious whispers filled the room as my teacher distributed our writing prompt for the dreaded English final. I tapped my fingers on my desk, awaiting the task that was before me. A small white slip was placed in front of me that read “What is your heaven on earth? Explain.” It seemed like a complicated question, but my answer was simple. Rockbrook is my heaven on earth because when I’m there I don’t have to worry about anything in the world and I can be my true self. Rockbrook is a place where memories last forever and you create friendships that will last a lifetime.” —Reegan

“Rockbrook Camp has helped me so much through the past years. It is my safe place from a crazy outside world. The people here understand me more in 4 weeks than my friends back home. No matter where we all go, I know we will see each other again and remember our glorious camp memories.” —Emily

“This year I am a CA, and it has been the best year yet! All the girls are so nice and love our counselors so much! We have shared so many amazing moments and laughs, and we are only half way through the session. I’m so blessed to spend this time with my favorite people!” — Anna

Memories that will last, made with people who know and understand each other, a heavenly escape from the outside world… Living together, gloriously free from worries. These girls love camp.

Finally, I can’t help but post these two photos from our Twilight activity tonight, an optional shaving cream fight and slip-n-slide. Dressed in their swim suits, and ready with a can or two of shaving cream, girls of all ages raced around our landsports field, squealing with delight as they covered each other in slippery white foam and laughing uncontrollably because they looked so hilarious with their hair sticking up. Then when slicked down with shaving cream, the girls could really fly down the plastic slip-n-slide, crashing and spraying through the water as they went. The whole event lasted a little less than an hour, but it was an incredible display of uninhibited joy. Love it!

Messy Shaving Cream Girls
Slip and Slide Laughing Girl

All This Action

What an absolutely perfect camp day! Completely sunny weather, a beautiful forest setting— the massive rocks, old-growth trees, flowering mountain laurels, cool creeks and waterfalls, ferns, and so many wonderful birds, and so on! —cheerful, encouraging counselors, and the energy of all these great campers, combined to set the day. Then, with dozens of different activities all happening simultaneously, the camp was alive everywhere with happy smiling girls.

Horseback Riding Girl
Lake Jump Kid

Most of our 28 horses met their newest fans while they walked, trotted and cantered around the horseback riding rings. The pottery wheels spun, the looms clicked, while rifles and arrows shot. Sequences of knots became friendship bracelets, and yoga mats lay flat for stretching and relaxing poses. Dots of paint, strips of tape, vibrant dyes and patterns of string decorated paper and cloth. Belay ropes led climbers up the Alpine Tower, and kayak skirts stretched tightly over our colorful whitewater boats. With bright blue skies above, the diving board, waterside, and lake toys kept girls happily splashing and delightfully cool. So much action!

Archery Camp Girl

Be sure to get a sense of all this action by spending some time browsing through the photo galleries posted for today. Have you seen them? You access the galleries by logging into your parent account. If you haven’t logged in yet, I think you’ll love the new way the system displays our photos. Each day there are several albums to view, enjoy and share by email or on Facebook. If you see particular photos of your daughter, or others that you like, go ahead and add those to your “Favorites” so you can see them all together at the end of the session. Also, I would suggest checking back often because we are uploading photos multiple times every day!

Rafting Camp Fun

Over at the Nantahala River today, there was even more outdoor adventure action because almost 60 campers took a trip down in rafts. Led by our team of experienced rafting guides (Clyde, who has more than 30 years of experience, along with Andria and Leland Davis, Nicole, Jamie and Thea), two groups of campers enjoyed bouncing and splashing through the rapids, like Patton’s Run, Delbar’s Rock, the Quarry Rapid, and the exciting Nantahala Falls (also known as “Lesser Wesser”) at the end. Rafting with Rockbrook girls is a little like a floating party, often pretty loud with singing and powerful screams, sometimes involving dancing and acrobatics (like falling into the river!), but always a complete blast because you’re laughing with your friends at every bump of the river.

Dinner tonight brought out the costumes —the first of many opportunities to dress up this session— with the campers and counselors dressing as superheroes. Sure we had Batman, Superman and Captain America to name a few, but we also saw Captain Underpants, Caped Vowels, and several versions of Wonder Woman. The dining hall was filled with strong, powerful, extraordinary woman, all super in different ways. More than that, we also made dinner tonight a celebration of everyone’s birthday by rearranging the tables so we could sit grouped according to our birth month. This mixed cabins to make tables with both younger and older new friends to meet, and, perhaps most importantly, with whom to share a homemade, highly decorated, birthday cake. With songs and shout-outs to different celebrities’ birth months (for example, “Happy Birthday Taylor Swift!”), we kept the whole meal lively, and definitely a little silly. It really was a blast.

Camp Costume Girls

An Awesome Afternoon

Welcome to camp! This morning we were extremely excited to open our second July Mini Session and welcome 96 girls to Rockbrook. About 60 of these are girls returning to camp from a previous year, and for them this was an especially exciting day because they would be finally seeing their old camp friends. There may have been some butterflies mixed with the excitement, but that’s completely normal. For the new girls seeing Rockbrook for the first time, their wait was finally over. Dressed in their blue RBC t-shirts, most of them, they knew this was the start of something good. The cheering and enthusiasm of the counselors set the tone right away.

Camp Chapel Program
Summer Chapel Camper

Meanwhile, since it was Sunday, the Full Session campers held their “Chapel” program, this time on the theme of “Friendship.” What a perfect camp theme! After all, making friends, being a good friend, and gaining the self-confidence to do this well is a major part of camp life. We do so many things together and share so much experience, it’s almost inevitable that you will find girls both older and younger than you to be friends with.  The Chapel program allowed some of the girls to talk about what it meant to be friends with someone, and many of the comments suggested things like being “nice,” a “good listener,” and “being supportive.”  All great ideas!

During the assembly on the hill today, we took this great photo of every camper and counselor in camp. A few staff members were absent because it was their scheduled day off, but this photo gives you a sense of how many people are here at Rockbrook. If you click the photo a larger version is available.

Whole camp second session 2014

After Rest Hour, our grassy sports field was the scene of an fun all-camp special event that, like so many others at Rockbrook, involved costumes, special snacks, music dancing, games and prizes, all based on a theme, in this case, a Pirate theme. Dressed in their best Pirate attire, the girls found a variety of games to play like a ring toss, corn hole with bean bags, bobbing for apples, a water pistol squirting a ping pong ball, and finding a piece of gun in a bowl of flour. One station was painting faces with colorful designs or just a skull and cross bones. At another a pair of “Gypsies” were reading palms and telling fortunes. The girls could decorate eye patches, or try to make a giant bubble with a hula hoop. One activity allowed girls to toss a cup of “slime” (a green, thick solution of jello powder, flour, water and food coloring) at someone, or vice versa, to be “slimed” by someone else. The snacks included cotton candy, snow cones (which were great in the hot, sunny weather), and soft pretzels. We also had two inflatable challenges to try: an obstacle course and a jousting competition. There was plenty to keep everyone busy and entertained as the girls tried each of the options. It was an awesome afternoon and a great way to kick off the session.

Carnival Obstacle Course
Camp Carinival Ball Game
Camp Water Pistol Game
Pirate Eye Patch Girls

Such a Beautiful Sight

We begin our Sundays at Rockbrook differently than other days of the week by, at least for the morning, slowing down our ordinary zany pace. First of all, we sleep in a little, enjoying extra rest, and then shuffle to breakfast before doing cabin chores and even before getting dressed… Pjs with a fleece pulled over, and robes being typical. Just rolling out of bed feels good once in a while! For breakfast we have a special “real world” treat waiting— freshly delivered Krispy Kreme doughnuts to supplement our regular cereal, fruit and yogurt bar, and today toasted English Muffins and warm scrambled eggs.

Sunday Morning Camp
Camp Chapel Presentation
Chapel Girl sitting
Girls camp outdoor assembly

After breakfast, the campers return to their cabins to change into their camp uniforms (white polo shirt, white shorts, and a red tie) and around 10am assemble on the camp hill for a flag raising ceremony conducted by the Hi-Up campers. Like Rockbrook girls have for decades, everyone forms a line around the flag pole, recites the Pledge of Allegiance, and sings “America the Beautiful.” Today under sunny, deep blue skies, surrounded by the full green of the woods around us, and with the breath-taking view of the mountains in the distance, all these girls in their red and white made such a beautiful sight.

Following this brief ceremony, the girls walk along the “path of silence” to the Chapel area of camp, which is a small clearing in the woods with benches arranged like a theater. Today the Senior campers and counselors presented their program on the theme of “Community.” Instead of a religious ceremony, these gatherings are for us a brief time during our week to pause and appreciate one another, and to contemplate the fundamental values and feelings we all share, no matter what our religious upbringing at home. We want all girls, irrespective of their religious beliefs, to feel comfortable and included at Rockbrook, so we strive to make our Chapel programs reflect that priority. Today Samantha played the guitar as her cabin mates sang a song they wrote. Several other girls spoke about how Rockbrook feels like a family to them, with each person bringing different gifts to the group. Everyone sang “Lean on Me” (the classic song by Bill Withers), and Sarah spoke at the end after reading the children’s book Anansi the Spider. Based on a West African trickster tale, it tells the story of how the moon came to hang in the sky for all to enjoy. These are sweet moments where your girls prove how sensitive and caring they really are.

Before heading into lunch, everyone gathered again for a more lively assembly on the hill. Here the Line Heads awarded the “Mops” (highly decorated mops… this session as 3 different “minions” from the movie Despicable Me) to the cabins with the best record of cabin inspections. The Hi-Ups performed a skit/song about their duties in the dining hall.  Three counselors competed in an exciting “minute to win it” style challenge of apple stacking to see which cabin would be “dressed” the next day by their counselor. With a few announcements from the directors, and a few rousing hand-clapping versions of the Line songs, everyone was pumped up.

Our afternoon activity put a twist on a favorite classic, the “Counselor Hunt.” Today we found ourselves on an alien planet where all kinds of crazy, friendly though shy, aliens (our counselors dressed up) were hiding. Each cabin took on the mission to scour the planet (all over the main part of camp) to find aliens and return them to our spaceship (the dining hall). There, we would discover that each alien had a mysterious gift or prize to convey to the cabin who found her… Special snacks, having rest hour by the lake, or picking out the night’s movie, for example. Be sure to check out the photo gallery to see all the colorful aliens the girls discovered.

Alien costume counselor
Game of counselors dressed as aliens

Jumping with Excitement

Sunny Horse Girl

The first full day of camp opened quietly this morning with a thick fog lingering from yesterday’s rain. Some girls, not yet accustomed to the schedule at camp, were up before the rising bell ringing at 8, while others seemed pretty sleepy when they arrived for breakfast at 8:30. Everyone though, enjoyed a hearty breakfast of oatmeal, fruit, yogurt, cereal and juice to start the day.

After breakfast, the girls assembled in their lodges (Each age group or “line” has it’s own stone lodge.) for a quick meeting with announcements and a song or two. These “morning assembly” times are another way that the girls in an age group get to know each other, see their counselors lead and interact with the group, and simply have fun doing something together. Activity time was next. Hooray! It was finally time to run off to a part of the camp and begin climbing, swimming, paddling, drawing, shooting, riding, and creating in so many ways. Without a minute to waste, there were girls with their hands in clay, holding rifles and bows, gripping paddles and paint brushes, climbing up onto horses and all the way to the top of our 50ft Alpine tower. Happily, the weather cooperated beautifully and with sun shining, we could leave our rain coats in the cabins and instead carry a towel down to the lake for a swim.

If you haven’t heard about Rockbrook’s “Muffin Break,” you certainly will from your daughter in a letter or after camp because it is a moment each day that everyone looks forward to. It happens between the first and second activity periods, and is exactly that, a break in the camp action to enjoy a freshly baked muffin served to everyone on the dining hall porch. It’s particularly exciting because the flavor changes regularly, so the girls are always excited to learn if today’s muffin is one of their favorite varieties. Today we enjoyed pumpkin chocolate chip, a classic and very popular kind.

Riflery Girl Protection
Kayak Girl Smiling
Camp Calendar Craft

This afternoon the “CA” campers, who are girls who have finished the 9th grade, took a hike in the Dupont State Forest. Their goal for the hike, besides enjoying the fantastic mountaintop views and blooming mountain laurel bushes along the trail, was to discuss their ideas for the end-of-session banquet. They needed to pick a theme for this special dinner/party they plan and produce for the whole camp, and since that theme is kept secret until the night of the banquet, discussing and debating the options away from camp is a good idea. They brainstormed more than a dozen initial ideas, and by the end of the hike they had selected an exciting and creative theme, one that included thoughts about the food to be served, decorations, costumes, dances, skits, props and music. They all seemed very excited about the idea… jumping with excitement …and I’m sure it will be a great event.

9th Graders Jump together

I hope you are enjoying the daily photos we have begun posting. If you haven’t already, you simply login to your parent account, and click the photos link. You’ll be able to browse through each day’s galleries, mark your favorites, and at the end of the session purchase prints or high-resolution downloads, if you like. Karin, Becca and Rachel, our camp photographers, are busy taking and posting these photos for you. We hope you enjoy them.

Thank you for sharing your girls with us. Camp is off to a great start!

Photos of Summer Camp Friends

Here’s a set of photos taken one Sunday afternoon at camp. We were queuing up for our cabin photos and took these at the same time. They show our traditional uniforms (white shirt and shorts, plus a red tie) that we wear on Sundays and at other special events. Children becoming such good friends at camp!

Cold Frosty North Carolina Morning

Barn covered in frost

Nurse Jenny recently snapped this photo of the land sports barn. We liked it and thought you’d enjoying seeing a “winter view” of camp.